^ I can't defeat Airman >;'c

< I'm looking forward to the three-day break from school. I should hopefully be able to get some music and art done >:O

> AP US History's tough.

v Are you particularly bothered by/uncomfortable with NSFW stuff by any chance?

^ Slightly. I would rather not...see it in general, but whatever floats other people's boat, I suppose.

< I may try to HDHR the new Outer Science that got ranked. It's hard bro.

> Bow ties > Normal ties

v Prefers warm weather over cold?

^ not really. i'm a bit more comfortable in cold weather.

< i'm a bit tired from the shit school's thrown this week. hopefully this three-day break will give me a chance to get back up to speed.

> the artistic skill of many nsfw artists is just insane sometimes. good enough that both nsfw and sfw look equally amazing, what in the hell? is nsfw the secret key to good art?

v doesn't really care for nsfw art all that much.

^ You're kidding, right? My waifu is a loli. I'm cultured enough to have ventured into that field. I'm not afraid to it that I enjoy myself in there.
< Still not a great mapper. I've had beef with quite a few, and I'm not exactly comfortable to talk about it here. If you really want to know the story, add me on Discord.
> I'm tired as fuck. I just came back from a buffet dinner my school hosted for an anniversary.
v Same question.

^ No, I actually dislike nsfw art and I avert my eyes from it most of the time. Unless I am doing that action in which case yeah of course.

< I started playing Celeste yesterday and I must say that from what I've seen so far it is absolutely brilliant. Definitely worthy of all the praise it's been getting.

> Euphoniums sound very warm, making them absolutely beautifull.

v You don't like to see nsfw art when you are not doing *that*.

^ ॼ

< ०

> ॾ

v ऽ

^ yep
< just completed a game recently and i feel empty
> >
v you're into philosophy

^ for the most part, yeah. i'm not really all that into it as i don't necessarily devote my time to checking out tons of books on philosophical topics, but philosophy is pretty interesting, and it seems to have provided some thoughtful perspectives along the way.

< i'm getting to play SC2 with Puzzle a little. kinda sucks that he hasn't been around the forums much, but he's p busy by the looks of things, which is pretty fair. i mean, i'm pretty inactive here as well.

> in an SC2 ranked match of 1v1, never give up until you know you can't fight back. if you have potent units, use them as well as you can, and don't throw 'em away. also, be attentive of your units as you macro into the mid-game and late game. expand often, and attack when you know you'll come out on top.

v you're not much of an anime fan, really.

^ Wrong, I am a pretty big anime fan. Though not the point where it becomes an obsession.

< Recently my has sight shifted from wanting to be good to wanting to improve. There is no such a thing as being good and so trying to reach that goal is futile and ultimately all you will do is be disapointed at yourself for failing to reach something that doesn't exist.

> nothing to say here.

v You value improvement over talent.

^ not really, I think they're equally as important. A hard working individual can reach the skill level of a talented but lazy person, but they can never be as good as a hard working talented person. Or at least that's how I see it.

< I feel like crap lately. I'm so sick of my daily life.

> sometimes I just wish the sun would stop rising once it's set.

v You are a talented individual.

^ i guess that's a fair way to put it. a lot of it was just working through what i could imagine and representing/expressing thoughts better through practice and eventual improvement, but a lot of it was a bit of creative talent, i suppose.

< i'm a bit apprehensive about school again, i kinda doubt my abilities right now considering that i'm hardly ever making much progress towards completing things, and i'm losing a bit of my following thanks to my longer gaps in release schedules... i dunno if i'll be able to even really grow much.

> adaptive music is cool.

v you believe vocaloids are a little over-rated.

^ It IS overrated

< My CDs just arrived today and holy shit does Taishi makes good music

> Taishi is love, Taishi is life

v You listen to Yamajet

^ i find the name very faintly familiar, but no.

< i'm a bit angry today. i don't have enough time too work on both my AP US History homework in conjunction with my music without having to sacrifice one of 'em, or sacrifice my own sleep.

> TAISHI IS LOVE. TAISHI IS LIFE.

v you frequently enjoy chiptune.

^ Yes. Some of my favorite chiptune composers are Chroma, Danny Baranowsky, Killerblood, etc.

> I have tons of history HW today too, what a coincidence

< It feels weird when 2/5 of your playlist is chill shit, and another 2/5 is hardcore shit. These things don't alternate pretty well tbh so I gave up listening to my whole playlist randomly and just listening to one album at a time

v You listen to Team Grimoire

^ back when and only when i played osu, they're my top map picks on multi
< slept 6pm, fully awake on 2am
> hopefully it doesn't ruin my sleep schedule
v would you prefer to have night shift at work?

^ Not night shift but evening shift are preferable to me.

< I don't really like when people use the term overrated or underrated. I feel like people use these words the wrong way. When I see people use these words, they want to say that something is liked too much/little by your community, implying that this something should be enjoyed less/more by the community, when in reality what it means to think something is under/over rated is that you personally enjoy something better/less than the rest of people.

> I hope my attempt at talking about both under and over rated at once didn't make my message too hard to read.

v You often find yourself using the term overrated and underrated.

^ Yes, and I’m both kinda ashamed and not about it. Half of the time I use those words to meme around, another half is when I unironically use it

< It was so hot in CA last night that I couldn’t get any decent sleep. The heat is relentless today too

> I miss cold weather in winter

v You have a hard time trying to sleep

^ not really. if anything, i keep falling asleep when i don't want to. if i were a cyborg of sorts, that'd honestly be great. i could live on and do my work without needing to piss or take shits, constantly having to drink or eat things just to sustain myself... aaaaaaaaaaaaaa i don't likey ;w;

< i'm a bit bothered by my lack of sufficient progress. call it high expectations, but i don't like having the work i plan to do remain unfinished.

> i'm still concerned for one of my old friends of sorts. she's still at it again, in a depressive slump of self-harm and suicide attempts. i feel i need to help somehow. if i can just talk to her more... or somehow understand how I can speak to her so as to say something actually helpful,...

...ngh.

v you've had some experiences with the death of friends.

^ no but I probably will
< yes
> toejam
v is not a human

^ I certainly hope that I am human

< I work better when I am under a reasonable amount of stress. When I am relaxed, I am easily distracted and often don't work as hard as when I am trying to finish something for a deadline. So I tend to finish most project pretty late.

> I accidently stole a recorder from my primary school. I don't really know what happened, one day I just looked at my closet, saw the recorder and wondered why I had this. My guess is that I brang it from school one day and forgot to bring it back and somehow the teacher didn't notice.

v You had a similar case of accidently stealing something without realising it.

^ I don’t think I have. I may have forgotten probably

<

samX500 wrote: 2h4d4w

< I work better when I am under a reasonable amount of stress. When I am relaxed, I am easily distracted and often don't work as hard as when I am trying to finish something for a deadline. So I tend to finish most project pretty late.

Same for me too. Working under stress for me is way productive than normal

> It is still so hot in CA

v You listen to maidable

^ I listen to who?
< I can't do 200bpm anymore.
> "As always, homies, we back with the foolishness. Now you guys know what I want!" rubbing hands "I wanna hear from you guys in the comment section about the topics I'mma bout to go over in today's video."
v Doesn't know where (>) came from.

^ You are right

< I really love low instrument, it's one of the main reason as to why the euphonium is my favorite instument. It has a very nice a warm low sound, without being stuck in only the low range like the tuba.

> The word "euphonium" literraly means "well-sounding"

v You prefer low instrument as opposed to high one

^ i...suppose? i do like dark, more heavy instruments, but light ones are nice too!! i...do hope that's what you meant.

< i haven't been online for a while because i'm on electronic punishment because school sucks, and work is piling up. got most of it done though, so now i'm here!

> upupu...is it punishment time yet?

v has heard of/has watched The Monogatari anime series?

^ not until now

< i hate sunny days... it used to be something i like... but i just hate it now... i hate those beams of eye-blinding sunlight entering my room...

> bagworms are badworms

v you like your room well sanitized

^ Not really well sanitized but I do prefer my room well orgranised. Disorganisation really disgust me. I do often end up disorganize but I don't like it when I do.

< I really dislike journalism, to me it's just speaking with limitation (limitation on what you can say, how long you can talk for, what content you can use and probably )and I really hate that.

> I was asked by some first year in my program to help them with some issue they had while writing this post.

v You've been asked help by your underclassmen before.

^ i was asked for directions to a classroom this one time. otherwise, not really. i tend to stick around people older than myself anyways.

< in a foul mood, but i'm getting through it.

> sometimes, both of your parents can be shitty people.

v you have a dismal relationship with at least one of your parents/parental figures.

^ none
< procrastinating
> oh hey my mousetrap caught two mice at once
v do you have collection of something (not digital)?

^ yes i have my hentai book collection

< i reached 4 digit this month

> i know how to spell pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis

v probably has a big hentai book collection as well

^ not really, no.

< i'm fairly burnt out. i've been trying to finish my damn songs while i figure out what a good font would be. so, i've been making this pixel font in the meantime:



> digital typography is pretty interesting.

v currently lives on their own.

^ Too young.
< I have literally no idea who I am anymore.
> Today's gonna be difficult.
v Also suffering from a cold.

^ nah... its been a while since i got a cold... last time i got it was at least 2 or 3 years ago... it lasted for a year...

< i just got a boost of dopamine this morning, and until now... i feel like i'm worry free...

> spider milk

v you haven't tried fried chocolate

^ and i don't think i'd want to... ehh.

< i'm getting really tilted over here in Thread Necromancy. i gotta get up there with my damn points, somehow...

> school got you feeling sluggish? your free copy of I-Need-A-Friend-At-School-To-Talk-To-About-Random-Shit!

v doesn't really know many people they can trust in real life.

^ True, most of the time other people are caught up in their own things and their own worlds.
< I'm too lazy to turn in my homework. I do it at home, I just don't care much to turn it in.
> "By all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyways. Because bees don't care about what humans think is impossible."
v Definitely knows where > came from.

^ used as bullet for listing?? idk
< woke up 4 am
> be me
v you're waking up early these days

^ haha, a bit too early. i wake up usually around 2-3 am, which is definitely not good for my brain
< i had some ice cream a little while ago and i feel a crap ton better than how i did yesterday. god bless frozen milk?
> save the bees, save the trees, and most importantly, save your knees!
v writes poetry?

^ indeed! it's more on the occasional side, but i throw in poetry with my other work, namely, my music, here and there.

< kinda tired. i'm at least glad i've got a 4-day break from school.

> ...but who knew that you could be so damn fatigued from hardly doing anything?

v struggles with low energy and fatigue.

^ I struggle with low motivation, but not exactly energy nor fatigue.
< Most people think I'm on natural cocaine.
> I'm really not.
v Knows what mitarashi dango (みたらし団子) is, or will look it up on Google.

^ just looked it up, and it looks really good! dang, i really want to try foods from other cultures and places, but i'm a picky eater...
< honestly, i might try digital art soon. might ask for a drawing tablet for christmas...so i can draw and play osu.
> uwu hours
v has watched and finished over 4 animes (if you off the top of your head, you could list them if you want! need some new anime reccomendations anyways...)

^ I have finshed well over 4 anime. If you want some recomandation my favorite would include:
Clannad
K-on
Hibike euphonium

Other amazing show would include (in no particular order)
Tamako Market/Love story
the Monogatari series
Nichijou
Chuunibyou demo koi ga shitai
Koe no katachi
Girls und panzer
Hyouka
Ansatsu Kyoushitsu

< I really love series that have amazing character. When a show has character that feel so real that you respect them as person, even if the plot is bad, boring or non-existant, you can still absolutely love the show. Slice of life anime are the best example of this, if I were to mention some specific exemple k-on (non-existant plot), Tamako market (bad plot) and shoujo shuumatsu ryouko (boring plot) are all among my favorite thanks to their amazing character.

> Even if a character is only imaginary, they can be so great that you are forced to respect them with the same decency you would respect an actual human being.

v Has watched and finished over 50 anime series.

^ I've watched 215 anime series according to my MyAnimeList profile

< My favorite anime genres are slice of life, comedy, romance, Shoujo Ai

> I own over 10 keyboards

v Is underage

^ Nope.

< I didn't drink a drop of alchool since I was adult.

> Alchool is overrated

v Don't like alchool

^ never even tried alcohol, cuz i'm underaged, i don't even know if i like it or not.

< had a dream where i drank a whole bottle of wine and not get drunk. kinda scary cuz this is the topic im responding to after sleeping for 10 hours and getting that dream.

> ngl tho wine has a nice smell

v didn't know that markers have the possibility of being a drug

^ edit: nope, but i sure do love the scent of expo markers/sharpies
< 16歳
> 日本語が良いです
v don't read japanese

^ I tried to learn Japanese a few years ago, only managed to learn Hiragana before I gave up. I still some so when I see hiragana I try to read it.

< Having a genuine motivation is the most important factor when trying to learn a new skill in my opinion. The only reason why I wanted to learn Japanese was because I thought it sounded cool, which isn't that great of a motivation and because of that I gave up really quickly.

> School should give value to the motivation of student. I am personally fine with school but it doesn't do much to motivate student to learn their subject. The fear of failure is the only thing really driving almost all student to learn, which is why they just forget most of what they learned as soon as they don't need it to avoid failure. Though it should be ed that giving motivation to people is really hard, since motivation comes mostly from the experience each individual had throughout their lives.

v Has given up on learning a skill because of a lack of genuine motivation.

^ not exactly, because i don't have any motivations to even start a skill. honestly, the only skill i need to probably learn is how to cook, then i'll be set for life. i know how to write and draw, i guess, so...yeah.

< honestly, writing isn't as hard as you think. yeah, putting words together is hard, but if you know basic english and stuff, you probably could write a novel with a good enough plot. you just have to get the punctuation and stuff right, make sure everything makes sense, etc. don't mind me writing in all lowercase though, haha-

> i wonder if pencils can have different colored graphite and stuff...

v has attempted writing something, doesn't matter if you failed or succeeded.

^ yes, it was really fun. i wrote a backstory for a character that was 4,000 words long, and 16k characters in length.
< i don't really have motivation to do stuff that I don't like doing, so I just try to get by with at least a D-grade in most of my classes. the ones i actually try in are orchestra and japanese, both of which i'm currently in the top class of.
> don't push yourself to be better than someone else at a rapid rate, just get there by your own pace. if it's fast by accident, that's fine. pushing yourself to the limit is fun, but it also burns you out at an extremely fast pace than when you're only doing it casually.
v hasn't eaten portuguese sausage and doesn't know what a heaven it is with some scrambled eggs and rice

^ yes

< i really don't know, but i try to be more efficient with anything i do,
but i always get disorganized with my homework and stuff like that

> i am not going to lie, but i lost my flip-phone on a Thursday, now I am
getting used to not having a phone.

v subbed or follows someone that's under 10k subs or followers and got no ☑️

^ yep, most of my favorite youtubers are unverified! mostly gaming/meme channels though.

< is there such thing as a grudge map? like a map that you wanna get revenge on because you missed that one note and want to FC so bad? probably.

> i got ultimate custom night for my computer so guess who's gonna get scared at 11 pm in the dark???

v has heard of FNAF/is a fan of it?

^ Of course, FNAF was the most popular game in the world for a period of time, though I never really got into the gameplay and never bothered to check the lore.

< I was able to produce some very clear and full sound on the euphonium this week. I am very glad, though I still have issue with properly switching between note.

> The great thing about brass instrument is that the sound is almost entirely from how you blow in it. It's one reason as to why I choose the euphonium, I am not very interested in learning a lot of different fingering to play every note like I would have to with a woodwind.

v Knows of Steven Mead?

^ sorry no
< had a good ol' fun fun time with my friend for the past 3-4 days
> i think she likes me back ?
v likes school for some reason

^ I actually do. I haven't had a ion to commit myself to when I was in highschool so school was the only thing to occupy my time. I think most people that dislike school mostly dislike it because they have other activity to commit themselves to and because of that they see school as a duty that takes away from their real interest where as I see school as a place to entertain myself from knowledge.

< I keep making the mistake of using dots instead of commas to separate numbers in my physics lab. I wish french also used dots to separate number, or at least that it allowed both format.

> Physics is the most satisfying things to learn about but I don't really like to actually use it. I just like to learn the raw concept and then learn how it can be put into numbers rather than using the equations that comes from it.

v Likes to learn about physics concept.

^ yeah, or any concepts, but i never go deep into them
< games less than hour/week nowadays
> should i get piano or violin?
v would prefer violin

^ Nah, I would prefer piano (or any wind instrument for that matter)

< I have been going to sleep early recently cause my grade have been disapointing.

> Astrophysics is awesome, it's one of the most entertaining subject to learn about.

v Is interested in astrophysics.

^ I'll pretend I know what that means

< Has the most original avatar

> Cherophobia is the word for the irrational fear of being happy

v Is a germaphobe with a snot fetish

^ not really a germaphobe, and definitely not someone with a snot fetish...

< i want to help people, but sometimes i cannot help them and i know it... it makes me feel bad...

> japan really out there flexing with their ramen museum huh...

v has a difficulty on trying to explain things

^ yes
< no
> she's here
v doesn't know who "she" is

^ You sound like you just had a mouthful of laughing gas cause you make no sense . .. . (nor did that) so no I don't

< Just got his braces off

> A sneeze travels out your mouth at over 100 m.p.h.

v Plays Osu.

^ Of course, everyone here plays (or has played) Osu!
< I´m bored.
> I´m currently experimenting with grahpics.
v likes anime

^ Not really. I used to watch anime, but stopped since most of them are just straight up downgrade from the original sources. That's why I only read manga now.

< Procrastination hits me hard today. 3:27 am and I still have to finish some papers. Nice!

> Some people are not self-aware at all, and it kills me inside whenever I see one of those people

v You listen to satella

^ no i listen to nf
< i'm just frustrated; nothing less, nothing more
> i have to perform in front of my brothers at their elementary school
v f

^ f(x).

< unbearably stressed lately. i don't know what the fuck happened this week, but i know i'm uncharacteristically frustrated. might be my shitty grades, in conjunction with my lousy productivity and whatnot. i'm just not really accomplishing what i've hoped to do, i guess.

> we both know misery...

v you enjoy listening to "hyi - misery" (i'm pretty much obsessed with it).

^ never heard of that song, sorry-

< god why is my sleep schedule so wack, the main important thing i have to do school-wise is a vocab test tomorrow but that's about it

> poyo

v enjoys card games?

^ generally, not really. if any, it might be Uno, but i don't actively care to play that. it's not my thing.

< i'm fairly apprehensive about what i have to do. i know exactly what it is i need to get to, but the methods of how i do that? i've got no clue. i just know i need to get there. i need to actualize what i've envisioned. i can't afford to fuck up when a life of misery is what i'd be left with. if i can gain a source of income through this, that'd be great...

> "I see myseeelf, in the mirror,
that's me somehowww.

I see myseeelf, in the mirror,
I can't believe that,
I won't believe that."

v you have a favorite genre of music.

^ Not really, I listen to a rather wide variety of music, mostly jPop, jMetal/jRock, vocaloid, electro, classical/band, and there might be some other genre that I would love but still haven't discovered. All in all I simply don't care about genre of music that much.

< Physics is a subject that I absolultely love to learn about but that I can't seem to be able to do. 2 sessions ago when I had my electricity course I had very weak grade until the last exam that I aced and this session in astrophysics I fear that I might fail the course unless I can do the same as for my electricity course in my last two exam.

> Astrophysics is dope AF.

v Likes to learn things despite them not being useful in day to day life.

^ some sort of mixture of "yes" and "no". in reality, i start researching pretty much anything within my short-term scope of interests regardless of whether it's useful to me. that's just how i am, i try to know everything i can. but, that's mostly dependent on me looking for information myself, i don't always enjoy that with things like schools and teachers as the structure there doesn't accommodate how i work and think. i need to care about what i'm doing to bother learning about it.

< i feel miserable and apprehensive, yet somehow hopeful. there's going to be a lot to do this week.

> i forgot to take a shit last night, fuck.

v you've forgotten to post your v before in this game.

^ why are you reminding me about my fear of doing just that? i am 100% sure i haven't done that yet due to the thought of forgetting, and getting embarrassed about it.

< i can't wait for christmas break! its just one month away, and i wanna just take a nice 2-3 week break!

> death is inevitable, but its okay! a book isn't complete without an ending.

v you once ed an event right before the deadline, and have to rush instantly due to that.

^ quite recently, actually. was interested in a art challenge prompt on the last day and finished it in the last 2 hours. that was the dinosaur-aquarium thingy i posted somewhere a week ago or so. probably in TN.

< i'm pretty much fucked at this point. i've got failing grades across a few classes, as low as 35%. i just wish that didn't have so much of an impact. at least make some sort of assignment i can independently pursue of my own interests related to the subject, instead of throwing me into a standardized curriculum. i despise this part of schooling.

> अ

v has been absolutely fucking exhausted this week.

^ Nah, I have actually been stricter on my curefew over the last week because of my fear of failing my astrophysics class. I missed out on a lot of points in the last exam because I wasn't attentive enough so being less tired is the best way forward.

< only 4 weeks of school left for me. I don't relaly ahve plan for this winter, I'll probably just spend more time on learning python. I am also considering learning c++ as well. I always planned to learn that language and I learned last weekend that it will be an important language in the university program I plan to take.

> Just found out about Ghibli orchestra a few weeks ago, damn it's good.

v Listen to Ghibli orchestra or has listened to it a few times.

^ Nope! I'll be checking it out now though since you've mentioned it ^^

< Next week are my exams!!! So nervous, though I think I'll be fine for most subjects. I'll need to study really hard for English since analysis essays are my weak point, but other than that, Maths, Science and Humanities should be easy-peasy.

> Trying out 7K! It's been fun so far, I can play lower Insane difficulties. I'll still need some time to figure out how to map and check it though

v Is planning to go somewhere interesting for vacation.

^ I'm going to Sacramento again for Thanksgiving, and we're probably going to be on a camping trip so kinda looking forward to that. Last time I was there, we went to lake Tahoe, and it was absolutely breathtaking (srsly, would recommend u looking it up if u have never heard about lake Tahoe)

< I'm exhausted from my sleeping schedule and workload from school. Someone puts me out of this misery

> 7k is so wonky to play for some reason, and it is not really about spacebar since I can play 5k pretty well. 6k is way better than 7k imo

v Is procrastinating rn like me

^ not actively, but most likely. i don't mean to, i just kinda end up not doing what i was assigned to do because i completely forgot about it or ignored it.

< my arms and hands are shaking so damn much. holy fuck. i'm all jittery.

> झ

v has been tested on the 16Personalities version of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator.

^ if by "been tested", you mean forcefully, no. but for fun? yes.
< desperado for the "ai", if you know what i mean
> https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/"bhiddchcegbhcfceba/fddgec0a0fahachffd/e0"-pixels.png
v does not want to know what > is

^ i'm curious.

< i'm burning out, i think. struggling to get artwork done.

> so fucking angy right now. argeny large. massive agnragey. aegranergerny of immense proportions.

v is in no way interested in IDM.

^ i guess, i even forgot what it means
< productive mode turned off during weekends
> as a result it's hard to get back when monday comes
v you take break on weekends

^ Not really. I work part-time on sunday and on saturday I practice the euphonium frmo 7 am to 3 pm unless I have too much study to do and have to study instead, which happens only at the very end of my session (aka right now).

< I am a bit stressed about university next year. I don't know if I'll be able to handle the workload.

>

v Has listened to the song I just posted.

^ mmm yes, love a good touhou mix/song! thank you for it!

< this forum has been dead...I pretty much forget that I'm sliiiightly active on the forums, so I'll try to revive it! hopefuly it'll come back...

> speaking of Touhou, my favorite Touhou character is Kanako! (from Touhou 10)

v is in the Touhou fandom? (even a little bit?)

^ yes... kinda... just a bit... honestly, i kinda like it!

< i may or may not have one week of doing nothing at school at december... its education week and i have to go to school anyway so... (also yeah... i noticed that this forum is dying rn... kinda sad tbh...)

> does anyone eat squash seeds with the outer shell sometimes? no? ok...

v does not like sweets

^ I do like sweets

< I recently just got a 95% in my astrophysics exam. That really feels good after how horrible my last exam went. I got a 54% and only did so because I wasn't paying attention during the exam. I could have aced that exam but I misserably failed it.

> Meika Hime & Mikoto are both incredible vocaloid.

v Listens to a lot of vocaloid/utauloid song

^ yes but mostly from cover artists
< anxious about consequences of leaving geef (edit:) in washington to go on vacation
> yes
v dated someone at any time in their life

^ never dated. at best, i've had a crush, but that ended up somewhat short lived after the first year or two, it was kind of a one-sided crush, i think. she likely wanted it to be more or less a simple friendship, i s'pose that's fine.

< struggling to make things work. my music still isn't getting traction and I need some kind of income soon.

> fucking thanksgiving parties. not a fan.

v actually enjoys thanksgiving, somehow.

^ We've never celebrated thanksgiving in my family. All it is to me is a day off school.

< Tommorow I will take my second english writing exam, and next week I will take me final speaking exam. I hoped that I would enjoy english this session but I've really hated it.

> Kai yuuki is so underated

v Don't play nearly as much video game as they used to

^ i hardly play any games anymore.

< thanksgiving's cool and all, but it really just means that i have to hole myself in my room so that i don't have to socialize with anyone, and go out of my way to not eat or drink a damn thing. at least i get to make music, i guess. would help if i could afford a damn laptop so i can actual go places and still make and show my music, and actually do things comfortably without all this damn clutter.

> h54 i3h 2u4 35j a3e

v झ

^ I looked him up a little after seeing your pixel art but I only know what parties he wants represents and nothing else.

< I don't really like stationary bike. I don't really feel any satisfaction from riding one since it's not moving and I have nothing to keep me pushing myself further. I much prefer jogging though in Quebec there is usually snow from at least November to March and even April so I can't do jogging for basically half the year.

> Bad north is a really great game. I've been playing it every evening until my self-imposed curfew.

v Has a strict self-imposed curfew.

^ no, my sleep schedule is absolutely bonkers. i literally slept for 12 hours today. Yeeeaahh, not really.

< honestly, i'm not really a fan of mint and chocolate together. it just tastes bad, the overpowering flavor of the mint and the sweetness of the chocolate. it's either one or the other.

> i hope one day, i'll earn enough money to upgrade my computer and maybe start streaming games. my computer now is really bad

v has over 20 games on Steam?

^ i don't even have a game on steam
< planning out our future house and what we're gonna do family-wise
> 3.1415926535897
v knows what they want to do in life

^ I know what I want to do for career but I am still not sure what to do family-wise. I don't know if I want to make a family or live alone. On one hand I fear that if I stay alone I will regret it when I am old and retired. On the other hand, I don't know if I can keep up with the world while sustaining a family, I have no idea how harsh the world is and I am extremely inconfident about my strenght to handle problem that are not pure logics.

< Had a bit of an existantial crisis about getting a family in the middle of my euphonium practice, all thanks to Clannad and Hibike euphonium, who are the greatest reasons why I am still considering getting a family.

> Crying feels amazing.

v Wants to have a family?

^ if you are talking about my future about getting married and having children... no... if you are talking about having a father and mother, i have them both and i don't wanna trade em...

< there is a lot of things i still doubt about myself right now... i am thinking of trying to get those doubts away...

> mr rime goes on a holiday

v is thinking deeply about the meaning of life

^ every once in a while
< hopefully now knows where to go and what to do
> considering dropping out school
v going somewhere this holiday break

^ Nah, gonna stay home with my family and open gifts and stuff. I know my gift this year (A Nintendo Switch, I know I'm kinda late...) and I'm super hyped! Hopefully I can get some of my friends gifts too!

< I hope I can find a plot I can stay attached to and actually finish a story for once. My brain turns to mush whenever I try and think of one. Maybe I can at least try to dream about one or something.

> Why don't schools bring back nap time???

v Has had a lucid dream before?

^ yep. they're pretty cool. got to meet my old elementary school friends right there at school, and told a few that i was dreaming, and that talking with them again was fun. had some fun with 'em but they're hard to get.

< bored. struggling to make content.

> ء

v is deeply fascinated with horror-related things, or generally disturbing things.

^ Within my own mind, yes, I came up with some of the most disturbing thing I've ever heard by making up stories in my own mind. When other people say it, no, I don't know why but I really hate to hear about disturbing things such as torture and rape even if they are artificial just like my own stories and even if what I come up with is usally far worse than what I hear. I don't know why but I can only accept disturbing story if I am the one making them up, otherwise I quickly feel sick and that feeling usually stick for a while and I have difficulty to focus on something else.

< Tommorow will be my last english course, which will be an oral presentation. After the end of my english course the last week of course should be fine since all I'll have to do is code and physics, which are both things I like to do.

> In case you like programming, I suggest you look up advent of code 2019. It's an advant calendar made up of 2 simple programming quiz each day. The quiz are very simple so you can do both puzzle in under an hour and even under half an hour if you are good and fast at coding. You don't need to be very good at programming to complete them so it's a very good way to learn about it.

v Can't wait for the christmass break

^ christmas break scares me
< i said to punch a guy in their no-no square if they grab your tootoo as an answer to a question from a serious presentation and now i'm getting clout because of it
> i also want a family
v likes cats more than dogs

^ Seeing my name, you could probably assume so. I'm way more of a cat person because...I'm sorta scared of dogs. Don't know why.
< Grrr, headaches are horrible, especially when you don't know why it's happening.
> If I'm calculating correctly, I'll be the 350th message on this forum! Nice!
v Enjoys puzzle games?

^ puzzles are cool.

< feeling so damn conflicted. quite a bit of work has been done, but it never seems to be enough. i insist i need to do more, yet i've been throwing myself at these projects for pretty much the majority of the day.

> how the hell do producers make music so fast, i can't even release within a month without a head start, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaireallyneedtofinishthissong

v you think water is tastier than soda.

^ not really. i mean it's good and all, but i can't resist the crispy taste of a fanta orange.
< probably going to be regarded as 同性愛者 after today
> hashire sori yo
v prefers hidden gems over mainstream games.

^ if they're actually gems, sure. mainstream/obscure don't entirely dictate the quality.

< i'm skeltal

> birbs are cool. ravens and crows are the coolest.

v thinks of the most random shit in the shower for longer than an hour.

^ Not in the shower, it often happens when I put myself to sleep but am still well awake. Most of time I've spent wondering about myself has been when I try to find sleep.

< Finally finished my english course. I counted and I need an average of 45% across my last two exam to the course and I think I nailed my speaking exam pretty well so I should be set.

> Python is great. I have been trying to learn it over the last mounth (though I haven't done a lot of progress I'll it) and it has a lot of advantages compared to java, which is the language I learn at school and am actually good at.

v Is interested in learning a craft other than their main activity.

^ Singing. I LOVE singing. But I can't do it. I've never been able to learn, or even sing much at all (except maybe for a tiny bit of time when alone in the house) because my family hates the idea of me singing. But it's my only true ion. I'd love to learn it when I'm older and living alone so I can manage what I do. I'd love to learn classical singing. I think I'm naturally gifted when it comes to higher notes, as well as my extreme enthusiasm and motivation. It kills me that I can't sing more than maybe 30 minutes a month. I just can't do lower notes or sing correctly. There's a difference between singing correctly and singing. I've gotten annoyed recently though, and started to learn singing stuff from free online tutorials. But I can barely practise because I'm self conscious as Hell. I used to sing all the time as a kid, and all that happened was my mum knocking down every single bit of my self confidence. Probably for the best.

< I basically returned because my mind's going down to Hell. All the mainstream Gods ain't enough for me. I need the Gods of Osu!. Today, I've completely lost someone I really trusted, and during a long, depressive episode, too. Everything's ultra stressful and the help I've been getting seems to all be escaping just as things are actually getting hard. And I have my mum stressed af, which I feel guilty for. I do have new opportunities for help, but I'm too scared to accept them. Just shoot me.

> I hate that I'm enjoying Jojo villain theme songs.

v Likes Japanese music.

^ I'm not sure if you mean, like J-Pop, anime music, or Japan-themed music, so I'm gonna label them mostly under the same thing and say yes. Sorta addicted to Touhou remixes/weeb stuff right now...will probably change soon.

< God I had a lot of ice cream a few minutes ago and I feel like I'm about to vomit...blehhhh

> Skideesu skimosu I wish I could play Osu

v Like succulents?